Love Vs Control

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My partner acts jealous and says it's love. Is it?

Love Vs Control

Sadly, the signs of a healthy relationship are not taught in schools or colleges. Many people, especially young people dealing with love's intense roller-coaster emotions, may not realize when a relationship is unhealthy. Some people, men as well as women, wrongly think that “love conquers all.”

Promoting Health in Families: Applying Family Theory to Nursing Practice (Elsevier Health Sciences; 2004) lists these warning signs of a controlling partner:

• Becomes frustrated for unpredictable things
• Becomes unpredictably angry
• Teases or belittles you in front of friends, associates, co-workers or complete strangers
• Wants to know where you are every minute of the day
• Argues that you should dress in a certain way
• Argues that you should only have certain friends
• Becomes jealous of the time you spend with friends, family or pets
• Makes you scared or uncomfortable from motions he or she makes such as slamming doors or refusing to move over to let you by. These are done when you do not comply with any of the points.

Controlling behaviors in a partner signal that the partner is or will soon be abusive. Abusers often claim that they are not at fault, because their victims "made" them become abusive. This is a further controlling tactic to make the victim feel guilty and more willing to do anything to appease the abuser.

   

Comments

11/16/2006 8:24:37 AM
surah said:

this is a good tip thanks


12/10/2007 5:37:54 PM
accumsunlack said:

mm.. thank you


3/19/2009 2:36:26 PM
alecia said:

i think its real love if your lover is jealous about you and tells you what you wear. it shows he cares about you and wht will people might say or think if what you wear is inappropriate..jealouisy is a sign of love...


5/26/2009 4:22:39 AM
jenn said:

that is a true factor and didn't realize I'm going through that right now ... and I don't know where to find a relationship therapist to go to.. or a website ... to make an appointment. thanx for the suggestion.




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